Emotional Regulation: a Polyvagal Approach
We live the lives that our nervous system has determined is safe for us. Sometimes it can keep us stuck and prevent us from sharing our thoughts and gifts with the world or connecting with others. Familiar chaos can feel safer than an unfamiliar peace. Why though? How does our nervous system come to this conclusion?
Polyvagal theory is based on the relationship between our vagus nerve and its relationship to emotional regulation. This theory was developed nearly three decades ago by Psychologist and Neuroscientist Dr. Stephen Porges. Our vagus nerve is a cranial nerve and a main component of our parasympathetic nervous system. For the purpose of this blog article, I’m going to keep it as simple as possible. In its most relatable terms, the vagus nerve helps regulate emotional and social expression and behaviour. It is also directly related to the part of our brain that detects and responds to threat. This part of the brain is unconscious, meaning it’s automatic or without thought. We call this neuroception.
Nervous System Emotional States
Our nervous system was designed to keep us safe - physically, emotionally, socially (we’re highly evolved emotional and social creatures, after all). When it perceives a threat, it will induce certain emotional states to help keep us out of danger.
3 States of Regulation/Dysregulation:
Dorsal vagal state (apathy, shut down, immobilized, numb, disconnected, depressed, hopeless, incapable, lack of energy, and in extremes dissociation).
Sympathetic state (“fight, flight, freeze, fawn or appease” - aggressiveness, on edge, anxiety, irritability, erratic energy, fearful, people-pleasing, over-giving)
Ventral vagal state (connection, responsiveness, ease, peace, stable or flexible energy, experience a full range of emotion, capacity, and creativity)
This is an amazing adaptive response. Our nervous system is always on the lookout to help keep us safe. It uses our past, similar experiences as a basis for comparison and this happens in milliseconds. However, through difficulties we all experience in life to different degrees, sometimes our nervous system can overreact and keep us stuck in an unhelpful state long after the original threat has passed.
Building Resilience and Regulating Our Nervous System
Neuroception (the threat detector in our brain) is primitive and not connected to our logical thinking brain; it lives in the body. We’re encouraged in Western culture to physically exercise and care for our bodies and we’re actively taught ways to do so (who remembers Phys Ed class growing up?). We also need to do the same thing for our minds. We cannot talk ourselves out of dysregulation; the nervous system doesn’t speak our language. Its language is somatics. Regulating your nervous system, through somatic exercises, combined with inner awareness of past experience and trying small change behaviours over time, is how we heal trauma and improve our mood.
This also allows us to grow and not remain stagnant. Instead, when we’re dysregulated, we make choices from a place of survival, which leads to going in circles, burnout, incongruence with our true needs and desires and inevitably, greater dysregulation. If we desire positive change and to reach our goals, we need to feel safe and regulated first.
We all need help with this from time to time. Please reach out below if you’d like help with regulation and to learn more.
